We lost a sports legend recently. It’s not the first time and it won’t be the last time. We all know this and yet it still hits hard. And it made me stop and think about a variety of different things, but specifically what our heroes and legends mean to us. I was neither a fan nor a hater of Kobe Bryant. I was a basketball fan during the generation of players with Michael Jordan, Charles Barkley and Karl Malone. Kobe Bryant came during a time when I stopped following the NBA with any regularity. Consequently, all I know about him has come from the news headlines and blurbs. And none of that matters. He was a legend and a hero to many people. There’s no disputing that fact.
With the passing of any public figure, there is the initial shock followed by tributes from family, friends and colleagues. From there the inevitable negative talk starts and the character debates begin. Collectively we like to complain about our famous sports figures and movie stars. We complain that they are overpaid for what they do. We decry their worth as role models and rail against the pedestal that we created for them. And to be clear, it is the fans that create the pedestal. It is the fans that choose who gets a pedestal. If there was a tried and true method to the formula, then more athletes and entertainers would use it. Luck gets them the pedestal and talent gives them staying power. Because someone has a big talent and the luck to propel them in the limelight, we decide that they are supposed to be perfect in all the ways the regular people are not. And that’s where we make our mistake. Perfection in a person doesn’t exist. Kobe’s detractors point to his past where he was accused of a sexual assault. I don’t know whether he was guilty or not. I do know that he came to terms with his accuser and apologized to family, friends, fans and the NBA. To my knowledge there have been no allegations before or after that incident. Does that one incident disqualify him to be a role model or legend? As an athlete there’s no arguing the legend. As a man to be a role model and hero, that’s a personal choice.
What we forget when debating the merits of a person’s stature is that we need our heroes and legends. Whether a child or an adult, we all have our heroes. We may call them by different names – legend, hero, role model, mentor, etc. but the place in our life is the same. As a child it starts with our parents or grandparents who seem perfect in our eyes. We try to emulate them and want to be just like them. It’s where we start learning about how to be the person we want to be. (My mom and grandfather will always be heroes to me.) At school age, we add teachers and coaches to our list of role models and heroes. From there it spreads to the larger than life personalities we see in our celebrities. Some kids want to be like a superhero and others want to be like a character in a book or comic. As a child, you pick your heroes for so many different reasons. Sometimes it’s because you’re being bullied and want the protection of a hero. Or it can be because you excel at an activity and admire a person who does the same. As is the case with most celebrity heroes it is both the lifestyle and admiration that propels a child to choose them as a hero. Any aspiring basketball player would look up to someone like Kobe Bryant. Same as aspiring actresses want to be the next Julia Roberts or Meryl Streep.
And then there are the heroes and legends that are based on their actions. Actions that we admire and hope to emulate. Military members, firefighters and other first responders fall into this category. Anyone who’s been touched by someone in their hour of need may see that person as a hero. There are those that have the words that inspire and uplift large groups of people like a Martin Luther King Jr. or General Washington. Words and deeds both big and small that meant something to one or thousands and propelled them from regular person to hero or legend.
Sometimes we carry our childhood heroes into our adulthood and other times we find new ones. Only now they are referred to as mentors. I know that I have colleagues that I consider to be mentors and even heroes. In some it is an admiration of the person they are and how they have helped me become a better person. In other instances, they have helped me define my value as a professional as I travel on my career path. Either way, people that I look up to whose opinions I value and whose approval has significant meaning.
Heroes and legends live on a long time after their deaths precisely because we need them in our lives. They help us become better people in ways that are not always obvious. We shape our actions and deeds after them. We change our ideology based on their words. We focus and hone are skills in order to emulate their success. These individuals never claimed perfection and it is not perfection that we seek. We should remember that the next time one of our legends passes on or before judging someone else’s hero.
One too many streams…
There are too many streaming services. And there’s still more to launch. I’m not the first and I know I won’t be the last to complain about this problem. I almost miss my cords because at least then everything was in one place. As it is now, everything is so segmented that I have to weigh which shows and movies are worth the cost of the service and which ones I can live with never seeing again because they are the exclusive property of whatever company owns them. Every channel thinks they should offer a streaming service it seems to me. After trying most of them, I’ve decided that not one is the be all end all of services. And rather than go broke trying to keep them all, I’ve picked a handful that have the best value to me. Everything else has gone back into the bucket with the question do I rent or buy? Yes, I’ve gone back to out right purchasing my favorite shows and movies. I fervently hope that the market gets so segmented that none of them profit as expected. How did publishing companies come to terms with a public library? That’s what the world needs. A digital public library of television and movie content. One can always dream, right?
