No one will ever convince me that words don’t matter.  Before continuing I have to confess that my language is completely deplorable.  I spent my formative adult years working in a warehouse with truck drivers and dispatchers who thought that the English language was only composed of 4-letter words.  Suffice it to say, I have picked up a slew of bad habits when it comes to language.  I acknowledge that it’s a little ironic for me to be writing about whether or not words matter.  And I’m not the only one who’s hypocritical on the subject.  The rap/hip-hop music industry argue that using colorful language or controversial racial slurs is okay to use because it is part of the culture’s vernacular.  And yet the Chairman of the Board for Papa John’s is stepping down because he used racial slurs.  A few weeks ago it was Samantha Bee called out on the carpet for using a vulgarity in her monologue.  I could name a multitude of others, but it all points to the same thing – words still matter.

It goes beyond racial slurs and vulgar language.  We don’t take care with the words that we use.  Words can hurt just as much as a physical injury.  In some cases, the injury from words can last a lifetime.  How often do you remember a slap to the face?  Pretty rare.  But the argument before the slap will be replayed in your mind over and over again.  Even years later, you can recall every sentence.  Words can undermine your confidence or make you second guess your decisions.  They hurt.  And it’s the kind of hurt that’s hard to get over.  Hard to forget.  Hard to forgive.  I think they might be even more damaging when it’s a conversation without the intent to hurt someone.  Thoughtless words that are tossed around and hit a target that it wasn’t even aiming at.  Tough when it comes from a stranger, but devastating from someone you trust or thought you could trust.

Some argue that women are more inclined to remember the slights.  The stereotype that in an argument it is the woman who unloads a laundry list of grievances that go back to the dawn of time is not completely false.  I’m not sure I buy into the gender argument when it comes down to it.  I know I’m guilty of holding on to past grievances.  There is a restaurant that I won’t even step foot in anymore because when I do, I relive the conversation over in my head.  And while I still call the individual who delivered the message a friend, the relationship changed.  I’m not alone in feeling like that.  It’s inevitable that the more mileage you’ve covered, the more bumps in the road encountered.  Unintentional though it may be, we’ve all been hurt and have hurt someone else with our words.

Conversely words can brighten up even the worst of days.  Interviews with homeless individuals have shown that a little thing such as eye contact and a few nice words can make all the difference.  There have been multiple stories where a person is thinking of committing suicide only to change their mind because someone said a few kind words.  That’s powerful.  Imagine what would happen if we assumed that every word that we spoke could have that kind of impact.  We don’t fully recognize that we all have power with words.  It’s not limited to great speakers.  Every single day we say things without considering the impact that our words may have on those who are listening.  So, yes words still matter.  Maybe even more today than ever before.  Musicians, writers, athletes, corporate business, comedians, any citizen or immigrant must accept responsibility for the words they speak.  It’s time to think about what we say and how we say it.  We can continue to claim that people are too thin-skinned or have gone off the deep end of political correctness or we can acknowledge the power of words and use them purposefully and with positive intent.  Words matter.

This is where I plug reading.  We don’t read enough.  Though I think people read more than are given credit.  I can’t write about how words matter and not plug reading.  It’s through reading that you expand your vocabulary and word usage.  And if you find the right material, it’s just a good way to spend a rainy afternoon.  And contrary to most academics, it doesn’t matter what you read.  I’ve read everything from the traditional classic novels to trashy romance and graphic novels.  If comic books are your thing, then go to town with comic books.  My favorite novel is Charles Dickens, “A Tale of Two Cities.”  But I also love the Anita Blake vampire novels by Laurell K. Hamilton (though the series went off the rails at some point).  I generally have 4 or 5 books going at one time for a variety of reasons.  And before you think that’s grandiose or boasting, keep in mind that I have the attention span of a gnat and get easily distracted.  I work a block away from the public library.  It’s time I paid a visit.

Update to the drivers license renewal – Success!  I am a legal citizen again.  I took my truckload of paperwork to the DMV and the only thing the gentleman wanted to see was a signed application and my credit card.  An eye exam, fingerprints and one picture later and I was out the door with my temporary license in hand.  Hours spent searching for all the documentation wasted.  10 minutes of time spent in the most crowded waiting room I’ve ever seen.  Best advice I can pass on – always schedule an appointment.  Average wait time was over 2 hours for walk-ins.